UNTIL YOU COME BACK TO ME AGAIN - PART 4


Rachel had slept around the clock that night. She hadn’t even stirred until 10am the next morning.

Brian hadn’t gone into the hospital, waiting to stay at the house and wait for Rachel to get up. As promised he set up an appointment for Rachel to see the therapist, Dr. Damon.

He waited while she showered and changed clothes and he took her to the Medical Complex in White Plains.

Honey took care of Jamie while they were gone. Her mother had phoned for an update, and she had also dodged a call from Rachel’s mother.

Honey breathed a sigh of relief when Brian and Rachel returned a couple of hours later.

Rachel was quiet, but in a better mood than she had been for a long time. She thanked Honey for taking care of Jamie and she picked him up and went upstairs to the nursery to give him a bottle and rock him before his nap.

Tucking Jamie into his bed, she kissed his forehead for one final time and went to her room to change clothes.

Honey and Brian were in the kitchen when she came back down. Honey had just taken the water off the stove for a cup of the hot tea that Rachel liked so much. She set the steaming mug in front of her sister in law and Rachel smiled up at her.

“Thank you both for everything you’ve done for me and Jamie.”

Honey sat down next to her and patted her hand reassuringly.

“Sweetie, we are family, that is what we do for each other. We love you!”

“I love you too. Thank you!” Rachel sipped her tea.

“We can stay as long as you need us to, Rachel.” Brian said to her.

“I don’t want to intrude on your lives any more than I already have.”

“You aren’t intruding. Get that thought out of your head right off the bat!” Brian admonished.

“That’s right! We love you and Jamie and we are here as long as you need us.” Honey promised.

“Well, Dr. Damon did say I should try to sleep more and if that means more of the sedatives like you gave me last night, Brian, then I would be afraid to be alone with Jamie. If he should need me during the night, I don’t think I would hear him.”

“Then that’s settled! We’re staying!”

And stay they did for almost 2 weeks. Brian and Honey retrieved more of their clothes from their house and they stayed in the guest room. Honey got up with Jamie at night if he needed her, and Brian watched over Rachel.

Rachel went to see the therapist twice a week. Dr. Damon really seemed to help her see that her life didn’t end with Jim’s. This had been something that Rachel knew but that knowledge had gotten lost with all of the pain she felt.

After the first week, Rachel tried to get some sleep without the tranquilizer and she was able to sleep as normal again.

She looked better too, the color returned to her cheeks. She began to eat again too.

Brian was confident that she would get through this trying time.

For Rachel, the time passed. It was very bittersweet for her. She didn’t think she should have to learn to live without Jim but she was.

It was now almost 3 months since Jim had died. Rachel still couldn’t believe he was gone. The summer had come and gone. Fall was just around the corner.

The sound of the axe hitting the wood was a familiar sound. She glanced out the window and couldn’t help the sigh of disappointment that it was Dan’s dark head she saw bent over the wood pile, and not Jim’s red one.

Her therapy had helped her tremendously. Dr. Damon was wonderful and she felt totally comfortable with him.

Brian and Honey still helped out, even if it was just dinner. Her in laws were so willing to take Jamie for an evening that it helped her. They all still checked up on her and that was how Dan had come over to chop her wood.

He’d shown up one day the week before and noticed a dead tree lying just on this side of the border of the woods.

He arranged to come back the next week on his day off to cut up that tree and several others so that Rachel would have firewood for the upcoming winter.

Jim had started on their firewood for the season, but had died before it could be completed.

Now Rachel watched out the window as she had numerous times before. Despite all of her progress with Dr. Damon, there was still a profound sadness that she wasn’t watching Jim out there today.

She waved when Dan looked up and caught her eye. He grinned and waved back, and then got back to work.

Rachel turned her attention back to the dinner she was preparing for Dan as thanks for all of his help.

The lasagna was ready to pop into the oven. She was in the middle of buttering the bread for making the garlic toast. Then all she had left was the salad. The apple pie was cooling on the rack already.

She looked out the window again to see Dan was no longer at the wood pile. The sound of his foot steps on the front porch gave away the fact that he was headed into the house.

“Hi, I think I have you caught up right now. At least until the next tree falls. Or I make one fall, which ever comes first.” Dan grinned, standing in the door way.

Rachel smiled back at him.

“Thank you so much. I appreciate everything you’ve done.”

“No thanks necessary. You’re family.”

“And family takes care of each other.” Rachel finished with a grin.

“You’re catching on.” Dan nodded.

Rachel shook her head and told him to get cleaned up because dinner was going to be ready in less than an hour.

Dan came into the kitchen and ruffled Jamie’s hair. Jamie was in high chair eating a cracker and grinned up at Dan.

“Smells great.” Dan said snitching a piece of cucumber from the salad.

Rachel made to slap his hand.

“It will taste even better so hurry and get done. I left towels out for you in the bathroom; feel free to take a shower.”

Dan blushed a little and mumbled his thanks. He left before Rachel could say anymore. He grabbed the duffel bag he’d had the foresight to pack before coming over today, and rushed into the bathroom on the first floor.

Rachel put the lasagna into the oven and finished chopping veggies for the salad. She could hear Dan’s off key whistle coming from the bathroom and she grinned at Jamie.

“Danny shouldn’t quit his day job, huh, Jamie?”

The baby laughed as though he had understood exactly what his mother had told him.

Less than a half hour later Dan came out of the bathroom, his hair still damp and curling at the nape of his neck.

Rachel had just pulled the lasagna and toasted bread from the oven. Her cheeks were pink from the heat of the oven.

“Can I help?” He asked.

“Um, yeah, you can take the salad and set it on the table. I have some Ranch dressing or I think there are French and Thousand too.”

“Ranch works for me.” Dan quickly assured her. He took the large salad bowl over to the table and turned as Rachel brushed past him to set the pan of lasagna onto the trivets.

“What did you want to drink? I do have beer or we could open a bottle of wine? Otherwise, I have cokes, milk or orange juice?”

“If we open the wine, you’ll have some too won’t you?”

“Wine sounds good.” Rachel moved over to the built in wine rack and made a selection from the red wines. She stopped long enough to grab 2 glasses and a cork screw and went to set the things onto the table.

Dan immediately took over the chore of opening the bottle. Rachel watched him, thinking that Jim used to open the bottles for them too.

Conversation flowed throughout the dinner. Dan was pleased that Rachel at least seemed to come out of the shell of despair she had been under following Jim’s accident. He felt comfortable with her, as he always had. Maybe too comfortable! His conscious rang in his ears.

He had been attracted to Rachel when he’d laid eyes on her. But she had only seen Jim and he walked away without a second thought.

But Jim isn’t here anymore! Dan’s face flushed with the realization of where his thoughts were headed. Daniel Mangan! Jim was one of your best friends and he is barely cold in the ground! How can you be thinking of his widow like that? Rachel isn’t any where near ready for you to be laying this on her!

“Are you alright?” Rachel’s voice broke into his thoughts.

“Um, yeah, I’m- everything is great. This dinner is wonderful, thanks again for having me over.”

“It’s the least I can do after you were working up such a sweat on your day off.”

Rachel didn’t seem to notice that Dan’s answering grin was a little tight, or she ignored it.

Dan prayed to get through that dinner and helped her clean up afterwards.

He watched her clean up Jamie the best she could, given that his face wasn’t discernable from his hair at the moment.

“Excuse me while I throw him into a bath quick. He likes to get into his food, as you can see.”

“Comes from too many dinners with his Uncle Mart?”

Rachel giggled and took Jamie into the bathroom to run a bath for him. About 15 minutes later she came out with Jamie wrapped in a towel.

“I’ll just run up and dress him and I’ll be back down in a jiff.”

Dan told her there was no rush; he had brought out the wine from dinner and poured another glass for them both.

Rachel talked to Jamie as she dressed him into his pajamas right away. Jamie babbled his own language and turned his head sharply as the wind chimes outside his window tinkled in the breeze of the evening.

“You like your chimes from Grandma?” Rachel took him over to the window to watch them blowing in the wind.

Jamie loved to watch them move in the air and Rachel smiled at the memory of Jim hanging them shortly after Jamie had been born. His mother had brought them back from London when she had been with Matt on a business trip.

Looking down into their back yard, Rachel heard a muffled bark from Patch. Movement in the tree line caught her eye and then she saw Patch run as fast as his elderly body could take him.

“Must have been an animal.” Rachel mumbled.

Kissing Jamie soft head, she told him they needed to go find Dan.

Dan was waiting in the living room and stood up when Rachel and Jamie returned. He immediately reached for the baby.

Jamie giggled and gurgled at Dan. Dan rubbed his face into the boy’s stomach, holding him over his head. Jamie laughed and held onto Dan’s hair.

Rachel was glad that if Jamie couldn’t have his father raising him, he at least had the strong male influences of the Bob White men. All of them had taken a special interest in Jamie, especially Dan.

Dan knew what it was like to grow up without a father. He had known his for such a short time, but Jamie would not have the memories of his father because he was too young.

Rachel took her glass of wine from Dan.

“I don’t have to drive tonight.” He grinned when he picked his up.

Dan stayed at Mr. Maypenny’s cabin when he was in Sleepyside. He seemed to be here every waking moment that he wasn’t on duty as a police officer on the NYPD.

The humidity was high on this September evening. Once the sun had set, it did cool off slightly and Rachel suggested the sit outside for a bit.

Dan carried Jamie out and Rachel pulled his play pen through the patio door.

He set Jamie in with his toys and then sat next to Rachel.

She breathed the night air in deeply and looked over to Dan.

“Thanks again, for cutting all of that wood for me. I really do appreciate the help. I never had to think of stuff like that. Jim just took care of it.”

Dan took a long swallow of his beer.

“Anytime Rachel, anything you need, just ask.” Dan’s dark eyes held her green ones for a long moment.

Rachel looked away first and Dan inwardly sighed.

It’s too soon. The thought simultaneously went through each of their heads.

They sat in the quiet for a bit longer while Dan finished his wine. Then standing up, he said his good nights to Rachel and rubbed Jamie’s head and then left.

Rachel watched as he walked toward the cabin in the woods.

“Jamie, are you ready to go inside now?” she asked her son.

Jamie looked up from the play pen and grinned.

“Come here, Mommy’s big boy.” She crooned.

Jamie put his arms around her neck when she lifted him up. They were both distracted by Patch barking from the preserve.

Rachel looked toward the sound, but didn’t see any sign of the dog.

“Patch must be chasing a rabbit.” She murmured to the baby. She picked up the two wine glasses and went into the house.

Rachel got Jamie a bottle and they went upstairs to rock in the big rocking chair in the nursery.

It had gotten darker while Rachel fed Jamie. It looked to Rachel that a storm was brewing and she hoped they didn’t lose their power tonight.

Jamie was sleepy and it didn’t take long to finish his bottle and fall sound asleep. Rachel stood up and carried him to the crib, laying him down gently.

With, a soft caress of his baby cheeks, she covered him with the light blanket hanging on the side of the crib.

She heard the rumble of thunder then and the flash of lightening.

Well, I was right about the storm. I hope the power stays on!

Passing by Jamie’s window, she again saw movement in the tree line. The rain decided to come down at that moment in a drenching downpour and Rachel couldn’t clearly see from the upstairs window.

She quietly left Jamie’s room, knowing he was a sound sleeper and wouldn’t wake from the storm.

Frowning with her thoughts, she wondered what she had seen moving around the woods tonight. Patch had barked too, so maybe something was out there.

Rachel had distractedly made her way to the kitchen to put the glasses into the dishwasher. The lights flickered once, and she sent up a prayer that they would stay on again.

She looked out the kitchen window into the back yard. The rain had let up slightly and in the flashes of lightening, it almost seemed as if a tree moved away from the woods. Looking closer, she could see it was a figure moving slowly from the woods.

Rachel frowned; surely Dan wouldn’t walk back in the rain just to check on them.

She concentrated and in the next flash of lightening, she could see a tall figure wearing a hooded sweatshirt. He or she, she couldn’t tell. But the person was moving slowly. The hood of the sweatshirt was covering the person’s head and face so she couldn’t see who it was.

But this person was definitely moving toward the house. Rachel picked up the phone and dialed Dan’s number at the cabin. He picked up on the second ring. It definitely isn’t Dan.

“Dan, there is someone walking from the woods and I can’t see who it is.”

“You aren’t expecting anyone? Maybe it is Regan checking on you and Jamie in the storm.”

“No, it isn’t Regan; it is from your side of the preserve.” Rachel tried to keep the anxiety out of her voice but Dan could tell she was worried.

“I’ll be right there. Stay in the house and don’t open the door. Make sure everything is locked, ok?”

“Ok, thanks Dan.” Rachel hung up and glanced again out the window to see the figure was still making very slow progress to the house. She rushed to make sure every door and window was locked tightly.

Turning off the kitchen light, she stood in the darkness watching the steady progress of this stranger. She felt better knowing she had a cop on his way. Dan could move through that preserve in his sleep. He’ll be here soon.

The closer the stranger got to the house; Rachel could see he/she walked with a decided limp. Explains the slow progress.

Rachel bit her lip in concentration eyeing the figure through the rain and lightening.

Suddenly, she detected another movement in the tree line. Dan!

Rachel let out a breath she didn’t know she was holding. Relief flooded her body as she watched Dan approach the figure.

The person had reached the edge of the patio when Dan finally caught up to him. Rachel suddenly panicked thinking this man could be armed. Seeing Dan grab the person by the arm and turn him around.

The person had his back to the house. She had already decided by the size of him he had to be a man.

Everything seemed to stop. The rain still fell and the lightening still flashed, but the two men stopped moving. Curiosity got the better of Rachel and she wrenched the back door open. Stepping out onto the patio, she called to Dan.

“Is everything ok?”

The lightening illuminated Dan’s face. His eyes were wide and he seemed to be in shock.

The man with him also turned to look at Rachel when she had spoken. Slowly, he put his hand up to pull his hood down.

Rachel’s eyes widened when the lightening illuminated the flash of red hair and the intense green eyes. Her fingers came up to cover her mouth in an effort to stifle her scream. Her breath seemed to catch in her lungs and she stood there and stared at her husband.

Suddenly, Rachel buried her face into her hands and burst into tears. Jim and Dan stood there, almost as if they were glued to their spots.

Dan made to move forward to comfort Rachel, but Jim held up his hand preventing him from moving forward. With a silent understanding, Dan stayed where he was and watched as Jim moved slowly toward his wife.

Rachel was crying uncontrollably into her hands and the sobs only got harder when she felt his arms wrap around her. The same arms she had mourned and longed for in her grief.

Jim placed a hand at the back of her head and held her tightly to his chest. His voice was raw with emotion when he said into her ear, “Please don’t cry, Rachel.”

When she had heard his familiar voice, her arms had moved around him holding him just as tightly in her desperation. She still cried into his chest.

The arms, the chest, his scent, were all familiars. They were all Jim. He was here, and alive. Suddenly remembering the limp, she looked up and her nursing training kicked into mode.

She ran her hands up to his wet cheeks, seeming to feel if he was in one piece. Her hands then explored his neck, shoulders and chest area.

“Are you alright?” Rachel sniffed.

Jim nodded. “In one piece more or less. I could really sit down though.”

“Oh my god!” Rachel turned and saw Dan still standing in the same position, still looking as if he was in shock.

“Dan, can you help me get him into the house.” Rachel put her arms around Jim’s waist and lent her support as they began to walk into the house.

Dan came onto his other side and lent his support and they slowly made their way into the house.

“What is wrong with that leg?” Rachel asked in her concern.

“It was the accident.” That seemed to be all Jim could say. It seemed to take all of his energy.

Dan motioned to Rachel that he could get Jim into the house and Rachel reluctantly let go of him. Stopping by the laundry room to gather some towels, she followed them into the living room. Dan was just setting Jim onto the couch.

By the interior lights, Rachel could see Jim was soaked and very tired and pale. She quickly rubbed his face and head drying it slightly.

“We need to get you out of these clothes.” Rachel said as Jim’s teeth began to chatter.

Dan excused himself to call Brian after Rachel asked him to.

Rachel carefully pulled the wet sweatshirt over Jim’s head. He wore a thin t shirt underneath it. Jim lifted his arms again and Rachel noticed he was thinner than he was before the accident.

She had so many questions for him. Where was he the last few months? What happened to him? Was he hurt after the accident?

Rachel asked Jim to stand up so she could take the wet jeans off. He struggled to stand and then stood still, holding onto Rachel for support when she unbuttoned the jeans and started to slide them down his hips. Jim sat down heavily and held his legs up for Rachel to remove the jeans the rest of the way.

She couldn’t help the gasp that escaped her when she saw the jagged scar on his left thigh. That explains the limp!

“Jim? Are you ok? I mean, after the accident?”

Jim had been resting his head on the back of the couch. He sat up and their eyes met. His heart broke over the concern that crossed her face. Her still tear stained face.

He had dreamed of being with her again every single day that he was gone.

His hand came up to cup her cheek and she pressed it into his palm.

“I’m ok, now.”

Dan came into the room and announced Brian and Honey were on their way.

“I didn’t tell them about Jim, just that they needed to come over right now.”

Rachel nodded, and said she was going to get Jim’s robe.

Dan volunteered to get it and ran up the stairs. Rachel knelt in front of Jim, pulling a blanket across his lap.

Jim gently pulled her down to sit next to him on the couch. Sandwiching her hand between the two of his, he looked at her and smiled gently.

“I love you.” he said.

Rachel felt the tears pooling in her eyes again and briefly closed her eyes to stop them from flowing down her cheeks.

“I love you, too. Jim- I can’t begin to tell you-“she was cut off with Jim’s fingertip pressed to her lips.

“I know, I know. It’s been hell for me too.”

Dan returned with the robe and Rachel helped Jim put it on. No sooner was he sitting back on the couch that the door bell rang. Dan answered it and held the door open for Honey and Brian to come through.



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